By Hilary Metcalfe
The journey to motherhood begins long before the first flutter of life is felt within your womb. It starts in the quiet moments when you find yourself dreaming of holding a tiny hand, imagining the warmth of a beautiful baby nestled against your chest. From then, you are connecting with the version of yourself as a mother, envisioning this new role and that life. It’s the beginning of matrescence - a poignant term that encompasses the process of becoming a mother.
This journey may come with a shift in mindset and ideally, a process of preparing the body and mind for pregnancy. This preparation phase can support your ability to conceive, sustain life and experience a healthy pregnancy and delivery. It’s called the “premester,” a sacred time of preparation as you pave the way for the miracle of pregnancy.
Preparing for conception is not just a physical endeavor; it’s a holistic transformation. But before this miracle unfolds, you can support your body and future baby by being well-nourished, healthy and as strong as you can be.
Nutritional Preparation and Achieving a Healthy Weight (3- 12 Months Before)
One of the most critical steps in this process is starting a prenatal vitamin regimen and adapting your diet. These vitamins are specially formulated to fill in nutritional gaps and ensure your body has all the essential nutrients it needs to support a growing baby. Folate, iron, calcium, and more importantly, magnesium and omega-3 fatty acids are just a few of the nutrients that play a crucial role in fetal development.
Magnesium supports muscle function, blood pressure regulation, and fetal bone development, while omega-3s, particularly DHA, are essential for fetal brain and eye development, reducing the risk of preterm birth, and supporting maternal heart health.
Folic acid, for instance, is essential for the prevention of neural tube defects (NTDs), which are serious birth defects of the brain and spine, as well as for the formation of red blood cells that prevent anemia. Its direct bioactive form, 5-MTHF, is recommended to be taken in daily doses 400-800 micrograms (mcg), ideally as part of your prenatal vitamin, before conception and during the first trimester. This form of folic acid is already active, making it easier for your body to use, especially if you have difficulty processing regular folic acid
But supplments alone are not enough. Your diet should be a rainbow of fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains. Focus on foods rich in folate, such as grass fed beef liver, nature’s multivitamin and highest natural and most bioavailable source of folate, leafy greens and legumes, and include omega-3-rich foods like fatty fish and flaxseeds to support brain development. Fatty fish sources like sardines and anchovies are both a more sustainable choice, and better for you with dramatically less risk of heavy metals like mercury build up that other and larger fish species have such as tuna. Equally important is what you choose to avoid. Harmful substances like alcohol, tobacco, refined sugars and fats and excessive caffeine intake (consider tapering to maximum 3 cups per day) can impede your fertility and harm your future baby. Now is the time to eliminate or dramatically reduce these from your life.
A healthy body weight is another cornerstone of a successful pregnancy. If you’re underweight, you may struggle with hormone balance and ovulation. If you’re overweight, you might face difficulties with conception and increased risks during pregnancy.
Having a higher fat percentage can impede fertility. This is given the fact that fat cells store and produce oestrogen by containing an enzyme which converts androgens into oestrogen. This hormone imbalance affects the menstrual cycle and the release of eggs during ovulation, making it more difficult to conceive. On the contrary, a healthier weigh for you height and body can assist fertility significantly.
Regular physical activity and a balanced diet is essential. This isn’t about fitting into a certain size or meeting societal standards; it’s about giving your future baby the best possible start in life. Engage in activities that you enjoy, whether it’s yoga, swimming, or simply walking in nature. This is your time to connect with your body, to love it, and to prepare it for the miracle of life.
Hormone Balance and Detoxifying from EDCs
Hormones are the silent orchestrators of fertility. They regulate ovulation, prepare the uterus for pregnancy, and support the early stages of fetal development. But in today’s world, hormone balance can be easily disrupted by stress, poor diet, and exposure to environmental toxins.The good news? Our hormonal balance may be fickle, but equally it responds well to efforts to re-balance. You can experience a turn around within a few months of hormonal repair efforts.
Stress is the biggest enemy of conception. High cortisol levels can wreak havoc on your reproductive hormones, making it more difficult to conceive. This is your cue to prioritise peace and calm in your life. If stress is a constant companion, consider therapy, a retreat, or a meditation practice. Whatever helps you find your center, do it now.
Herbs for Managing Stress and Fostering Restorative Sleep
Sleep is the cornerstone of good health, and nature has provided us with gentle yet powerful remedies to soothe our minds and bodies. These herbs don’t just offer a moment of peace—they are clinically studied to help relieve anxiety, support your nervous system and deeper, better sleep. All of which can be found in The SABI’s blends for sleep and calm.
Lavender
Lavender is perhaps one of the most well-known herbs for relaxation. It has been used for centuries to calm the mind and body, making it an excellent choice during the premester. Lavender’s ability to reduce anxiety and improve sleep quality is well-documented. A study in the Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine highlighted that lavender aromatherapy improved sleep quality in postpartum women. For those preparing for pregnancy, lavender can help manage stress and promote a restful sleep, which is crucial for hormone regulation and overall health.
Chamomile
Chamomile is a gentle yet powerful herb known for its calming effects, and ability to reduce anxiety and promote relaxation. Additionally, it is known to improve sleep quality, which is vital for hormone balance. Its anti-inflammatory properties also support overall health, creating a more balanced internal environment conducive to conception.
Lemon Balm
Lemon balm, with its mild lemon scent and flavor, is another excellent herb for stress reduction and hormone balance. Traditionally used to lift the spirits and calm the mind, lemon balm has been shown to reduce anxiety and improve cognitive function. It is also known to help with insomnia, which is essential for maintaining healthy cortisol levels.
Detoxifying from EDCs
Endocrine-disrupting chemicals (EDCs) are ubiquitous in modern life, found in everything from plastics to cosmetics. These chemicals can mimic or interfere with your body’s hormones, leading to imbalances that affect fertility. Detoxifying from EDCs involves more than just avoiding certain products; it’s about making a comprehensive lifestyle change. Start by choosing natural, organic products for your skin, hair, and home. Use glass or stainless steel instead of plastic, especially when it comes to food storage. Detoxification can take time—typically, it takes about three to six months for your body to rid itself of these harmful substances. But every small step you take moves you closer to creating a safe and healthy environment for your future child and improving your own health.
Health Check-Ups, Vaccinations, and Lifestyle Adjustments (6-12 Months Before)
Health Check-ups and Vaccinations
As you prepare for pregnancy, it’s essential to get a comprehensive health check-up. This is not just a routine visit; it’s an opportunity to ensure that your body is in optimal condition to support a pregnancy. Your healthcare provider will assess your overall health, review your medical history, and ensure that all necessary vaccinations are up to date. Vaccines like the flu shot and MMR (measles, mumps, rubella) are crucial to protect both you and your future baby from potentially dangerous infections.
Managing Chronic Conditions
If you have a chronic condition such as diabetes, hypertension, or thyroid disorder, now is the time to work closely with your healthcare provider to manage it effectively. These conditions can have a significant impact on your pregnancy, but with the right care, you can minimize risks and promote a healthy outcome. This might involve adjusting medications, adopting a special diet, or increasing monitoring. Remember, the healthier you are, the healthier your baby will be.
Our recommendation is to take a pre-pregnancy hormone panel to measure the levels of various hormones in your body and assess your reproductive health. This pre-pregnancy hormone panel typically includes tests for key hormones that regulate the menstrual cycle and fertility, often measuring Follicle-Stimulating Hormone (FSH) and Luteinizing Hormone (LH) to assess ovarian function and ovulation, Estradiol (E2) and Progesterone to evaluate the menstrual cycle and uterine lining health, and Thyroid-Stimulating Hormone (TSH) to ensure proper thyroid function. Anti-Müllerian Hormone (AMH) is tested to gauge ovarian reserve, while Prolactin levels are checked for their impact on ovulation.
Additional tests might include androgens like Testosterone and DHEA-S to detect conditions such as PCOS, and insulin levels to identify insulin resistance, which can affect fertility. These tests help identify any hormonal imbalances that could impact a woman's ability to conceive and maintain a healthy pregnancy.
If this is difficult to get from your healthcare provider, there are now bespoke services and private clinics offering more affordable panels than ever before. Here are some in the U.S and the U.K.
In the US:
- Modern Fertility offers a comprehensive at-home hormone testing kit for $179. This kit is particularly convenient as it allows you to collect your sample at home or visit a local lab, with results reviewed by a physician and delivered to your personal dashboard. This is a cost-effective alternative compared to traditional clinics where similar tests can cost upwards of $1,000.
- CNY Fertility provides a variety of affordable fertility services, including hormone testing. They are known for their lower prices compared to the national average, making them a popular choice for those seeking cost-effective fertility treatments.
In the UK:
- ABC IVF offers a variety of fertility treatments and hormone tests at competitive prices. They focus on providing high-quality care while keeping costs accessible, with various locations across the UK.
- UKCFA (London Fertility Clinic) provides a range of fertility tests, including hormone panels, with prices starting from £30 depending on the specific tests required. They offer personalized consultations and are well-regarded in the UK.
Mental and Emotional Preparation
Preparing for pregnancy is as much a mental and emotional journey as it is a physical one. The premester is a time to address any lingering mental health concerns, whether it’s anxiety, depression, or unresolved trauma. Don’t hesitate to seek therapy or counseling if needed. Engage in activities that nourish your soul—read books that inspire you, spend time in nature, or practice mindfulness. Surround yourself with supportive people who uplift you and share your journey.
Lifestyle Adjustments
As your conception date approaches, it’s time to make some final lifestyle adjustments. Reducing exposure to environmental toxins is crucial. This means prioritising clean air, water, and food, and avoiding chemicals in household products and personal care items. Equally important is sleep—adequate, restful sleep is essential for hormone balance and overall health. Create a bedtime routine that helps you wind down and ensures you get the rest you need.
The premester is more than just a period of preparation; it’s a time of transformation. This is your moment to embrace the power of intentionality, to honor your body, mind, and spirit as you prepare for the profound role of motherhood.
Every choice you make—from the foods you nourish your body with to the herbs you incorporate into your routine, from the way you manage stress to the care you take in balancing your hormones—creates a ripple effect into the future. These choices aren’t just about enhancing your fertility; they are about creating a nurturing environment, both within you and around you, that will support a healthy, joyful pregnancy and beyond.
Now is the time to take action. Start by weaving these practices into your daily life, one step at a time. Begin with nourishing your body with a balanced diet rich in essential nutrients, and complement it with powerful herbs like lavender, chamomile, passionflower, and lemon balm to soothe your mind and foster restorative sleep. Prioritize self-care, whether it’s through meditation, a calming bedtime routine, or simply taking a few moments each day to breathe deeply and reconnect with yourself.
ABOUT HILARY
Hilary is the Co-Founder of the SABI, a Holistic Nutritionist, natural, whole foods Chef, product developer and advocate for women getting to know their bodies, cycles and selves better. Born in Los Angeles, California and raised in Baja California, Mexico, she now lives in Amsterdam, The Netherlands with her partner Kees, a curly-tailed rescue dog from Curacao, Flint and her rainbow baby, Paloma.
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